My Sweet Beast
by Harley's Little Harlequin
Summary: New relationships can be rocky, no matter how much you want them to be like the books and movies, and one pink haired witch is about to find out that the books and movies never said anything about what to do when the man you are hopelessly in love with is a shut in self proclaimed monster. (Rated for later content)
1. Chapter 1

"How can one man be so bloody stubborn!"

Nymphadora Tonks screamed to herself as she flopped down on her bed ignoring the mismatched pillows that fell to the floor in the process. She had just trudged through the door of her little flat just outside of the crowed London strip, she had been at Grimmauld Place all afternoon with her cousin and his best mate Remus Lupin, the one man that she was talking about, just talking after a particularly long Order meeting sharing a bottle of pixie-wine, her favorite, and without even thinking she let herself have a bit more than she knew it would take to build up her courage and if all else failed she could come round the next meeting and apologize saying she was drunk.

But that was not the case nor how it happened at all! It happened more along the lines of her having one sip to many and when Sirius left the room for a moment to feed Buckbeak she let her feels burst from her mouth without time to give her the excuse to be drunk, they had hardly opened the bottle of wine, her words hung thickly in the silence as her face flushed and her mind screamed RUN IDEOT but she couldn't move as she looked at the older werewolf before her.

Remus didn't meet her eyes but rather kept his on his half full glass of pale pink wine running his finger one around the rim before he took a breath and looked at her his blue eyes boring into her soul and piercing her heart like daggers as it beat wildly.

"Nymphadora-"

"Don't call me that! Please..."

She was surprised how her voice became small and her face flushed deeper.

"Tonks...I've told you before and I'll say it again, I am too old, too poor but above all I'm too dangerous...you deserve someone younger, someone who can give you what you want in life, someone who isn't a danger to you..."

Dora felt her cheeks redder again but not of embarrassment but in anger, it wasn't the first time he had used these three things against her and it wasn't the first time she had tried to make him understand she couldn't care less.

She opened her mouth to counter but about that time Sirius came back and she closed her mouth trying to act like she didn't want to knock some sense into the man sitting across from her but every now and again when Sirius was distracted he'd steal a glance at her but look away when he met her grey eyes.

Finally after half of the wine was gone she decided it was time to go fearing that if she had any more she'd start picking arguments she didn't want to happen. She got to her feet and said her good-byes before walking to the door only to stumble as her head became slightly foggy by the wine, she somehow managed not to fall and when she looked it was because of the rough and page worn yet gentle hand that was wrapped around her forearm. She fallowed the faded jumper covered arm to the scared but young face for Remus making her heart skip a beat then whirl into overdrive.

She straitened up and cleared her throat as he slowly released her arm.

"Um thanks."

She didn't wait for him to answer before leaving the house and now here she sat her face buried in her patched quilt hating the world when there was a tap on her window. She aromatically got to her feet wand drawn but relaxed seeing the little black owl on the window sill. She opened the window and took the letter from its beak before moving and pointing to the tray of owl treats and water on the small table.

After the owl flew to the table and began eating she sat down on the bed to open the letter looking over the neat writing with a confused look. The words '_We need to talk, away from Sirius and the others_.' Were written in an almost calligraphic way. Moments later there was a knock on the door down stairs making her set the note down and carefully make her way down the stairs and to the door and drawn as she opened it enough to peek out but the person outside was not who she was expecting to see even though she had no clue who to expect.

sorry abouth the length of this chapter it's a bit of a water tester and I wanted to cut it off before I got to far into it, please reveiw and thank you all!


	2. Chapter 2

~Hello all and thank you for coming back. Not much to say here other than please review and tell me your thoughts! Thank you and enjoy!~

Dora opened the door enough to peek out side not sure who to be expecting but she was sure it wasn't who was standing on her door step. She closed the door and undid the chain lock opening it completely to reveal Remus standing with his hands in his pockets as he avoided her eyes by looking over her shoulder. Breath caught in her throat she stepped aside to let him in and after a moments hesitation he stepped over the threshold as she closed the door behind him.

"Nymph-"

"Don't, if your here to apologize for earlier I get it, you don't want someone like me, I let the wine get to my head and made a desperate last attempt but you made your point."

She cut him off crossing her arms in an attempt to hold back the tears she could feel sting her eyes, or were they changing color? She turned away to the kitchen glancing out the window as the now grey sky let loose a pouring rain.

"You're welcome to stay out the storm, do you want some tea?"

She didn't look over her shoulder at him any longer than to see him nod before she heard him speak.

"Yes please thank you, but Nymohadora that's not why I'm here..."

He paused watching her as she clinched at her first name but didn't correct him while she placed two tea bags in two cups and poorer water over them before casting a warming charm as she waited for him to continue. Remus swallowed the lump in his throat as she stayed quite.

"Nymphadora why I push you away has nothing to do with you. You deserve someone much better than me, you deserve a young and whole man not this poor old werewolf..."

Dora set her wand on the table and lifted the mugs carrying them over and handing one to him before walking to the living room sitting in a strait backed arm chair done up in a deep purple fabric gesturing for him to sit. He thanked her quietly for the tea and sat on the maroon colored couch across the small wooden coffee table from her setting his mug down and looking at it trying to gather his thoughts.

"You do remember I'm an auror right Remus? And that I'm trained to handle situations with werewolves?"

His eyes hit up to her and he seen she had set her mug down as well and was looking at him with now teary lavender eyes.

"How could I forget? But it's not a question of your training or abilities it's a matter of being with me in...in any sort of relationship...will be the same as dragging your name through the mud, you'll become an outcast..."

He trailed off looking beside him now realizing she'd moved to his side on the couch and her hand rested light on his arm.

"Look at me Remus, what is there to drag through the mud that hasn't been splattered by it already? I'm the daughter of a blood trader and a muggle born, I'm a walking freak show that the last war made everyone think that my gifts and the people who possess them are born traders..."

He looked at her and shook his head.

"You're none of those things, you're a beautiful, skilled and wonderful young women there isn't anyone I can think of that doesn't like you and no man that wouldn't want you..."

He stopped speaking as she snorted rolling her eyes.

"Any guy that has a fantasy maybe, but apart from that I can think of one man that doesn't want me and a list of people who hate me, most of them family!"

She shook her head again as she got to her feet going to the widow her arms crossed as she looked at the sheeting rain. The room was silent apart from the sound of the rain and the ticking of the Alice in Wonderland style clock on the kitchen wall.

"Why do you push me away? There has to be more than the fact you're a werewolf right? What's wrong with me?"

Remus looked at her wide eyed as her small voice broke the silence but her back was still to him and her arms weren't crossed so much as wrapped around her waist, her hair had now gone from brown to deep chocolate brown and created a veil between them as it tickled her shoulders. He felt his heart crack as he stood and went to her hesitantly putting a hold to her lower back.

"There is no other reason, there's nothing wrong with you at all I want you so much it's hard to even think clearly when your near me...but that's the issue...I'm afraid I'll do something...we both will regret..."

He didn't finish his sentence as she turned to face him and he bent down until their lips were inches apart before she stood on her toes closing the gap between their lips closing her eyes. As soon as her lips touched his a small part of his brain was yelling for him to pull away and distance himself but the rest was fuzzy and unclear as he found himself wrapping his arms around her so she was closer to him while her back was pressed against the wall. She broke the kiss looking at him breathless.

"The window frames...jabbing my...spine."

He carefully moved her so her back was against the wall this time and before he could talk himself out of it placed his lips to hers again. He felt her fingers move from his hair along his cheek fallowing the path of scars making him flinch enough to break the kiss and look away from her. Her fingers finished trailing along the longest scar of his face before tilting his chin up to make him look at her.

"Did I hurt you?"

He shook his head unable to stop the small smile her words brought but it soon faded as he looked into her eyes.

"Aren't you afraid of me? Disgusted by these scars?"

Her eyes suddenly became hard and determined as she placed both hands to his cheeks so he would look her in the eye.

"Why would I be afraid of you? Why would I be disgusted by these scars or any others you have? Your heart is what I'm looking at, when I watch you around Harry and Sirius and the Weasley group how anyone could look at you and see this monster you claim to be I don't understand, your heart is where your true self lies. Right here is sweet and loving and kind and gentle right here is your true self."

She let go of his cheek to place one of her palms to his chest over his heart which kicked into hyper drive under her hand as he looked into her eyes. He tried to find his voice but he couldn't making her smile and place another kiss to his cheek but that was all she was able to do before he pulled her closer to him just holding her. She smiled looking up at him.

"See your human after all now come here."

He lessened his hold so he was just holding her hand as she led him to the couch and sat down with him but finally glanced over his shoulder at the darkening sky where the amber hues were giving way to deep purple and black skirts of night, just beyond the London buildings the glow of the moon began to peek. As if reading her thoughts her fallowed her eyes then kissed her cheek before standing.

"Tomorrow, don't worry tonight we need our resident auror on her toes tomorrow. Now sleep tight."

He placed a kiss to her temple before showing himself out softly closing the door behind him. Once the footsteps outside were gone Dora got to her feet and went to the bathroom and ran herself a bath looking over herself in the body mirror on the wall her fingers brushing over the long scar that resided on her hip and stretched to nearly her naval. Her mind wondered to Remus as her fingers trailed over the scar that had the same feel as the ones he bared. She shook her head and took her bath letting the thoughts wash away in the bubbles. After her bath she changed into her night clothes and curled up in bed watching the moon outside the window until her eyes became to heavy to keep open.

Remus entered Grimauld place softly closing the door behind him before going to the kitchen finding Sirius still awake looking over a paper.

"Letter from Harry?"

Sirius looked up at him setting the paper down and nodding.

"That old hag is at the school and she's not letting them use magic, now she's checking all incoming and outgoing mail."

Remus shook his head sitting at the table looking over the letter.

"So where did you go to? Chase my baby cousin down?"

Remus felt himself blush faintly as he set the letter down clearing his throat.

"That's none of your concern Padfoot."

He stood and went to the door.

"I'm going to bed you should sleep rather than brood all night."

Sirius was about to protest but Remus gave him what James would have called 'The Prefect Moony Look' and he nodded getting to his feet fallowing up the stairs to his own room shutting the door. Remus climbed the last set of stairs and entered the room at the end of the hall closing the door his mind stuck once again on the events that had unrolled just moments ago in the London front flat of the girl he loved but pushed away. He sat on the bed his head in his hands before he looked out the window at the moon it's nearly complete circle taunting him.

Shaking the aching in his bones he dressed for bed but rather than sleep he starred at the moth eaten canopy of the bed his mind replaying the scene in Dora's flat but there was something else something nagging in the back of his mind like a warning that something was not right and his gut told him it had nothing to do with his feelings for Nymphadora Tonks...

When Dora opened her eyes in the morning the sun was covered by deep grey clouds and the wind was roaring. She sat up looking around the room for a moment before forcing herself to get ready taking nearly 15 minutes to decide her hair color and shape before flooing to the ministy eating a piece of toast as she did. Once she stepped out of the glossy black marble fireplace in the atrium she hurried to the auror office flashing her badge to the security wizard as she did so before going to her desk starting paper work like she'd been there for hours.

"Late again, you'll never keep this job like that."

Dora didn't need to look up to recognize the voice of the only other young auror in the department, Robert Kingston the 19 year old green horn in the office who's training had begun just as she was graduating to full auror.

"Shut it, so long as I get my work done they never know the difference unlike you."

She looked up from the paper she was filling out as he perched himself on the corner of her desk shrugging.

"Yeah but you do mostly field work, they sent you to Azkaban last week."

Dora shuddered remembering the trip well and how she'd avoided the wing her aunt and uncle were in. She shook her head closing a folder filled with papers and began another one.

"That doesn't make my job easier just more dangerous now what did you want I have work to do?"

Robert stood again pointed over his shoulder.

"You're wanted by Scrimgeour."

Dora put her quill down and after making sure her hair was a soft brown color, she wasn't allowed odd colors when talking to the head of the auror department, fallowed Robert to the office knocking on the door.

"Enter."

The cold voice from the other side made her shudder as she remembered Snape's same cold tone back in school. She pushed the door open and entered closing it softly behind her.

"You wanted to see me sir?"

Scrimgeour pointed to the chair in front of his desk which she took feeling like a student awaiting punishment. Scrimgeour finished the paper he had been writing on before looking at her his eyes looking over her chose of hair color before he stood.

"There is a field assignment that has been requested of you, we need a certain individual found."

Dora nodded and took the folder she was handed opening it to look at the person she was looking for. Her heart sank as she seen a girl who couldn't have been more than 13 looking back at her in the photograph with deep blue eyes.

"She was taken from her family nearly 10 ago by Fenir Greyback what we want you to do is find the girl but don't remove her from the pack."

Dora looked up confused but before she could say anything Scrimgeour continued.

"You will begin looking the day after next when the full moon has passed, once you find her report your location and stay with the pack until back up arrives to retrieve her."

Dora swallowed thickly closing the folder and nodded.

"Yes sir, is that all?"

The older man nodded and with a dismissive wave she left looking at the clock as she went counting the hours mentally before sitting at her desk looking over the girl's, Emily Carson's, file learning the nature of the disappearance and learning she had been the daughter of a former ministry employee, she looked at the disappearance date and the pack members involved, a list of werewolf descriptions mixed with a few names, but one stood out to her, the description of a male werewolf.

"Male werewolf, grey in color, smaller than alpha (Fenir Geryback) but larger than the other pack members, green eyes and scars across the face and muzzle."

She felt her stomach lurch as she read over the description only half aware of her hair turning from brown to sickly green as she felt ice run in her veins.

"Tonks? You okay?"

She looked up hearing Robert's voice and as soon as her eyes met his he straitened up going to her side of the desk.

"What's the matter you look ready to be sick?"

She took a minute to gather herself before she quickly packed up the folder and papers getting to her feet.

"It's nothing just ate something bad for breakfast in going to go home for the day cover my shift for me?"

Robert nodded already used to taking cover shifts for her at points. As soon as she stepped out of the fireplace in her cousin's home the sun had begun to set casting a fiery orange glow around the abandoned living room but she didn't pause to take it in as she stomped to the kitchen looking around her before her eyes fell on Sirius looking at her bewildered.

"Nymphie? What's the matter? Aren't you supposed to be at work?"

Dora clenched her fist hoping her voice was steady.

"Where is Remus?"

Her voice was steady but there was more than a touch of acid in it making Sirius get to his feet.

"He's not here right this minute. Calm down Nymphie what's the matter?"

Dora didn't answer for a long moment, she could hear Remus hiding behind the hidden entrance to the kitchen behind the china cabinet but if he wasn't going to come out and face her then she'd have to say everything in front of him and Sirius.

"I've been asked to find the werewolves responsible for a missing girl from 10 years ago, she was taken by a group lead by Fenir Greyback. The group consisted of all males most unknown apart from Greyback, Ryan Jhonsten, and Seth Arrons..."

Sirius looked confused at her crossing his arms.

"And what does any of that have to do with Remus?"

Dora pulled the folder from her bag and handed it to him so it was open to the page describing the small group of werewolves.

"What werewolf does that second one sound like?"

Sirius read over the paper and Dora watched as his eyes widened. She looked over at the china cabinet as it was moved aside from the secret entrance then closed but before she could even open her mouth Sirius closed the folder and set it on the table putting his hand on her shoulder making her face him.

"Listen to me Nymphie, that was Remus but he was doing what he had to, his instructions were to gain the packs trust and that meant being Greyback's right hand, he didn't lay a hand on that girl but he couldn't stop the others from taking her because if he let his cover slip he would have been killed."

He paused glancing out the window before Dora could blink she was standing behind a large black snarling dog, across the room near the china cabinet she saw Remus as transforming, her instincts told her to run but her feet stayed firmly planted on the spot and her hand drew her wand from her sleeve. She watched as bones broke and reformed and howls of pain filled the air around them her heart breaking with each one. She felt Sirius push her with his side trying to make her move while he growled but she wasn't going to budge.

Looking at the grey werewolf across the room her heart sank and all anger vanished, his forest green eyes were pained as he looked at her and whimpered. Every nerve in her body screamed for her not to do what she was thinking but she ignored it and stepped around her cousin who quickly captured her sleeve in his teeth pulling her back.

"Let me go Sirius. I'm fine I'm a big girl I can handle myself."

Sirius whined his eyes pleading but she felt his teeth loosen. She looked at the werewolf that seemed to be recovering from transforming as it rose to its feet, it's size made Dora's courage waver for a moment as she seen its shoulders reach nearly the middle of the cabinet, she swallowed looking back at Sirius.

"Let me go Sirius."

Her eyes glanced back at the wolf as it growled green eyes locked on where Sirius had his teeth locked on her coat. Sirius whined again but let go of her but watched her carefully as she moved her wand to her pocket and showed empty hands to Remus.

"Has he been taking the wolvesbane?"

She looked at Sirius who shook his head making her sigh and return to the task at hand. She took a hesitant step forward but stopped seeing the wolf before her flinch back growling louder.

"Easy does it Remus."

Her voice was calm but her insides were flipping all over as she took another slow step forward her eyes never leavening his. She watched as she took another step and the wolf leaned closer to her sniffing at her out reached and before snorting and laying at her feet head in its laws making her blink at the change.

"What just happened?"

Sirius turned back from the black dog looking at her.

"One of two things, your scent brought his human mind back or well..."

She looked at him as he paused but before he continued he stepped closer shifting back and taking her sleeve in his teeth again. At once the wolf was snarling again on its feet fur bristled and teeth bared. Sirius backed off at once and the wolf grumbled sitting beside her. Dora could feel the corse grey fur brush her hand and slowly she reached her hand to the wolf's neck feeling the fur. The wolf have a throaty sound but it wasn't threatening as it lay down again allowing her to keep her hand on his neck fingers running through the fur.

"Merlin he's like an over grown dog. He calls this dangerous?"

She looked at Sirius who shifted back keeping his distance and leaning on the counter.

"For now, looks like Moony found a mate after all."

Dora's eyebrows knitted together as though the word were foreign to her until the wolf nudged her with its muzzle making her stumble back and land hard on the floor. The wolf gave a snort she thought sounded more like a laugh making her give a growl of her own.

"What was that for?!"

The wolf simply laid its head on its paws watching her as she scooted closer letting his fur again. Sirius watched the scene from the counter shaking his head as all the jokes Remus had made about getting married came back to mind. Dora yawned after awhile and her head began to droop making the wolf inch closer to her until her head was resting on its side as she fell asleep. It nudged her cheek with its nose getting a grown in response before she nuzzled deeper into the warm fur making the wolf relax and rest its head on its paws eyes looking at Sirius.

"Don't beat yourself up about it Moony, you love her what else is there to say other than don't freak out in the morning."

The wolf huffed making Sirius know Remus had taken over control again.

"Hey it's not my fault your furry little problem chose her just take care of her."

The wolf huffed again and closed its eyes as Sirius sat at the table looking over Harry's last letter for the hundredth time letting the other two sleep.


End file.
